TRANSFORMATION
With the farm sold and limited equine-assisted learning programs for Detroit Horse Power, until their downtown equestrian facility was complete, I was seeking purposeful work. A colleague employed by Northwood University (NU) encouraged me to return to their faculty.
There were thirty-six students in NU DeVos’s Graduate School MGT 614 Leading and Managing People. They moved from a bachelor’s to a master’s program because of COVID; meaning they were not required to have a credit bearing internship prior to being accepted into the program. Only one student, count it – ONE, had real-life experience working in an organization. Yet, the course outcome description included, “apply the principles and concepts of organizational change management and culture to leadership”; “Integrate the challenges and solutions to leadership decision-making in a diverse, global context” among other real-life applications. HA!
I was told that the curriculum was set, meaning I wouldn’t have to spend any time to redo it – just push “play”. That couldn’t have been further from the truth. I spent hundreds of hours researching current tools to support their learning of topics such as organizational change, strategy, and leadership.
The curriculum was so outdated, I could barely use any of it. For example, the very first article I read, “Leaders and Leadership - Many theories, but what advice is reliable?” was from 2013. It included, “By the dawn of the Industrial Revolution the Great Man theory dominated explanations of leadership…the history of what man has accomplished is the history of the great men who have worked here.” It blew my mind! I shouted obscenities out loud from my lower-level office that I’m sure could be heard miles away. What had I gotten myself into?
Committed to doing my best, in spite the curriculum, the technological barriers, and other challenges, I dug through all of my experiential books, folders, and resources seeking activities that would engage. My goal was to not only access their left critical thinking brain, but it was also to invite their right creative brain into the room. Throughout my career I’ve found incredible success facilitating leadership through self-refection and self-awareness. Recognizing this approach can be uncomfortable for participants that are used to a more sit-and-git, sage on the stage approach, I was determined to bring my true, authentic self to the course, warts and all. Effective leadership, afterall, includes vulnerability, as well making mistakes, then owning the process.
These students all knew the system; they’d been in it. I didn’t. So, they also knew how to game the system and take advantage of me. They’d miss class, turn in assignments late, or use Artificial Intelligence (AI). I was always generous, to a fault.
I stayed true to myself, knowing from years of experience facilitating leadership, that not everyone was going to be engaged. When there was pushback or resistance, I reminded myself that “when the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” All I could do was try my best and that’s all I asked of them. Nice in theory, challenging in practice.
The evaluations included:
“This professor was extremely nervous each class period and it showed. Sometimes she seemed not prepared for the class with the materials. Also, some of the activities were childish with lots of coloring and arts and crafts type of things. The professor also sometimes made very passive aggressive comments towards some of us students. That was difficult to deal with as a group. Overall, I enjoyed the class and learned a lot, but there were some things that made it difficult to stay engaged and want to attend class.
“Make sure the professor has a full understanding of what is expected of her. I get it was the first time teaching this class but most of the time things felt like they were pointless or she just genuinely didn’t know what was going on when we didn’t either. This isn’t her fault, I loved her as a professor and would love to have her again but I think she needs to be given better resources and support.”
“Instructor made passive aggressive comments to our class at times. We worked hard to participate often and go along with her childish activities. We often drew pictures in class. Sometimes I felt like I was in elementary school. However, she was still rude to us saying that she would never teach ever again because of us. She was also unable to manage the classroom, especially opinions that differed from her own.
“It would be greatly appreciated if the course discussions could allocate less time to the topic of horses, allowing for more focused exploration of the core subject matter”.
“While I acknowledge the professor’s dedication, it is my sincere belief that their skills and talents may be better suited to a different occupation such as Horse Farming where their strengths can be fully utilized and appreciated.
“Don’t teach the students actual pseudoscience as exercises and stop referencing horses so much”.
Thankfully, in my inbox was also the following:
Molly sent: “Thank you for a great semester! I appreciated all of the different exercises that you brought to class to help make our lives a bit more entertaining. Everything you put together did not go unnoticed. Thank you for being a great listener of our needs as well as a great educator. I am confident that thanks to your class both mine and my peer’s confidence in being a leader has increased. I know coming back to teaching was a bit stressful and uncomfortable at times, but I think you did a fantastic job. As a leader, sometimes you need to step outside of your comfort zone, and seeing you break through that barrier to come back to teach a grad school class was very inspiring. I just wanted to take a moment to thank you for everything. Happy Holidays!!”
The critical feedback leveled me. After a brief grieving period, I reframed the experience, looking for the lessons to learn. I found some peace in a podcast by Chad Littlefield that reference a model for facilitators. He shared that we’ll never get 100% of participants to be connected, there will always be a percentage of curmudgeons and critics.
Fast forward, two and a half years into the future. My daughter Katie’s, finances dad, JW Fisher, was receiving Northwood’s Outstanding Business Leader Award. Kate invited Randy and I to attend because of my connections to the U. I appreciate any chance to get to know her future husband’s family. That, and I was comfortable there would be other people at the event we were connected to. I had no idea what “connected” would mean.
Arriving at the Henry Ford Museum of Innovation, Randy and I wandered around, exploring the exhibits. Katie, James (Katie’s finance), and other members of James family joined us at a high-top table where we held our drinks, munching on crab stuff mushrooms, asparagus wrapped prosciutto, and curried chicken on a skewer. We visited with several Frankenmuth and NU people we knew, it was a lovely reception.
An older distinguished looking woman wearing “Northwood blue” announced it was time to move to our seats for dinner and the presentation. The Fishers had two tables reserved. The one closest to the stage was for family and kitty corner was the one for their other guests. Randy and I sat next to a young couple in their early 20’s.
I turned to the young lady and man sitting next to me, asking what brought them to here. They shared that they were with the Gerstacker Foundation. Having done some work for Gerstackers I asked if they knew my friend, Mary Anne Ackerman. They said they did not that they had only been a part of the organization for the last couple years, just having graduated with a master’s from the DeVos business school.
I shared that I had been on NU faculty for several years providing equine programs, and most recently facilitated a course for DeVos. The young lady, Lauryn, looked me square in the eye and said, “I know, I was in your class”. A chill ran through my body. This was the class from hell. I could tell Lauryn registered my panic; I’ve never been a good poker player, my face always reflects what I am feeling.
I started to explain to her that I tried my very best, though I knew not all the students appreciated those efforts which I learned from some very harsh evaluations. She told me that she and a lot of the other students didn’t appreciate my approach until they had other classes. I was one of their first master’s courses, so they had little experience to compare. She said that for the next two years they found other faculty that basically “phoned it in” and didn’t try to engage the students like I did. Lauryn went on to share that it took not only experiencing uncaring faculty to appreciate the depth of my preparation, it took living in the “real world”. Once she got a job, she was able to apply, in actual situations, some of the things I shared with them.
I breathed a huge sigh of relief, and told her that after reading the critical evaluations, I had landed on “they didn’t know what they didn’t know”. She was basically verifying my hypothesis.
Just as she finished by telling me that my course – MY course – was the most transformational one of her master’s program the Master of Ceremonies started the awards program. When the alumni recognition program concluded, all of us stood to leave the dining area. I turned toward Lauryn and thanked her for her candor. I shared with her that it meant a lot to know that my instincts were right, then I asked her if I could give her a hug. She said yes, awkwardly putting her arms around mine.
What a full-circle moment. A reminder that all we CAN do is to try our best. In the words of Maya Angelou, "Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better."
Describe a transformation that has taken place in your life. What were the circumstances that led to this total change?
Is there a transformative experience you’d like to create in the future?
What actions can you take to positively impact the likelihood of this happening?